Life ain't fair. Deal with it.

Thursday, October 5, 2000 [by:SpaceBass]

One time I was walking downtown when I stopped to tie my shoe, but I slipped and accidentally stabbed myself in the head with an electric griddle transformer. I only vaguely remember insisting on finishing the job of tying my shoe before I would let them shovel me into the ambulance. Since it was embedded so deeply, the doctors couldn't remove the switch, but they covered it up fairly well. Unfortunately, I'm now revisited by a new version of my greatest fear from childhood: the classroom boner; believe me, it's ten times worse when that little light comes on to announce that you are 'hot and ready.'

By the way, for those of you who still don't know how to wipe your own asses, I found you some directions.