Monday, June 18, 2001 [by:Geneva and SpaceBass]

Do you ever stretch your leg out straight and play with your kneecap? It's kinda cool how it squishes around under your skin, slipping back and forth over the other bones in your leg. Then you get curious and push a little harder, testing the limit of your patella's mobility, when all of a sudden it pops and slips around back. Then, after unsuccessfully trying to slap it back in place with a hockey stick, you grab a steak knife and dig into your leg with some vague glimmer of an idea that you're going to slip it out the back door and stitch it back in place in front, but you cut the wrong leg and sever a major artery at about the same time that the pizza guy arrives, but since he was an hour late you got distracted by your kneecap and now you're lying bleeding to death three feet from the door and he can't even hear your screams over the elephant.

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